I’ve been on a mega binge for five days. Thanksgiving aside (because I eat and drink as much as I can/want without feeling like it is a binge), I’ve been challenging the confines of my stomach and now im sitting here feeling overly full and sad and gross (gross because ugh so full, I actually feel ill).
I don’t know what the mental or emotional issue is that’s happening that’s causing this binge, but I need to get it under control because I don’t want to feel like this.
I am enough. I am enough. I am enough.
Please send me your good vibes today! Big opportunity and I really really want to make this come true! Hopefully I will be posting more on what this is, but for now, I don’t want to jinx it.
I had another great night in the gym last night. I really do enjoy being the only woman in the weight room 99.99999% of the time. Partially because lettuce be real, some of these dudes are fun to look at surreptitiously, but also because I don’t find myself comparing my body or my work to anyone else.
Cardio warm up + overhead presses + assistance work + treadmill sprints + stretching.
I’m not tracking things aside from my final rep, because that makes me a bit neurotic and crazy. I am just going to enjoy what I’m doing and push myself. Feelsgoodman.
I did have a realization last night that I am nervous for my best friend to come in from Chicago for Thanksgiving. While it’s completely irrelevant, and largely unlike me, she hasn’t seen me since I’ve gained a bunch of weight from the stress of the move, and then I realized that NO ONE OTHER THAN THE PEOPLE IN SAN FRANCISCO HAVE SEEN ME FOR THREE MONTHS and I got tripped out and self conscious. But I am simultaneously acknowledging this feeling and refusing to dwell on it. I’m doing the work and mostly eating the better food. And (it may be a little sad that this is something to be proud of) I have had four days in November in which I didn’t have any alcohol, and that’s a pretty significant improvement over once per month.
Now if this afternoon will come together, everything will be coming up Millhouse.
Both feet fell asleep! Ten more minutes here til I go back to work then?